Reservations @ 24 O’Clock

The strongest element of our acquaintanceship, are these reservations… these insecurities and intimidation. The sheer amount of patience or persistence, to even get here in the first place.

I don’t really know you, I just know of you. From the times I had seen you in passing, on campus. A silent fan of your entire ambiance, I managed to speak. A greeting indeed, yet too bleak for remembrance.

I licked my lips said “Hey” it was all I could muster. Stupid fool, too cool for a true approach… I turn around, for a quick glance, I’m still dying to know you. I could ask your homegirl, but she wants to be you. See she plots to usurp the attention, I render.

Ever met someone first? And then met their friends next? And then wish circumstances, were switched? Well I have and I do, not ashamed to admit, that I wish you were the one that I knew.

Your natural twists, flourish through my abyss of desire and tangle my soul. I have wished to be words, far more than a kiss just to float over your tongue and soft, lovely lips.

To be considered, at least, a contender for sheets, you would share with another instead. Pillow talk til morning, then embark on our journeys, we’ll do it again the next night.

I hope that you’ll read this and know that it’s you. The reservations I have, are suited much better as dinner for two.

Inspired by Daily Post – Daily Prompt – Reservations

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11PM

SO many miles between here and there. Hella vibes from a Spotify playlist that was gliding in melody with my wipers and steady rain. A perfect rain really, one where you can cruise with the window slightly cracked and not get a drop on you. I could hear the sound of tires cutting through the fresh, untouched raindrops on both sides of the street. Then the traffic lights started flashing.

Must be 11:00PM. As I turned right at the light, my eyes passed over the empty passenger seat. I passed a few gas stations, it must have been their glistening lights calling because for some reason I stopped at the next one. I pulled up at pump 4 and saw my cousin on pump 7. Cuz stays in the streets, so figured I may as well get some GAS with my gas. The situation was so random, I had to put it on my Snapchat with the local Geotag like “Yo! Look who I ran into.”

We chopped it up a bit, he always has the craziest stories about his night before, when I noticed people replying to my Snap video. We grew up in the same neighborhood, went to the same high school, so our circles interlock at some points. At least three mutual homies were telling me to tell him to answer their texts. I guess they weren’t so fortune to catch him at the Shell station and were still waiting on their gas bags. I thought I got them all but underneath, the first message after I posted my cousin, was a message from someone I knew he didn’t know. “You headed home or still out tonight?”

I put what my cousin gave me in my arm rest and went into the store for some Swishers. The Arab dudes that run the store are hella cool but they play too much sometimes. There’s always some old-head trying to bear hug as many Miller Lights as possible and run to the counter to check out before you, only to be paying in quarters. Bitch. The cashier picked tonight to give him shit about it of course, so this only furthers the time it takes for me to get out of the store. There’s this other dude that hangs far enough off the property to not be soliciting but close enough to yell “Aye nephew, you got a quarter?”

Truth be told, I don’t even like being out and about after 10:59 anymore. I’d prefer to be off the streets by then. But when you’ve nowhere to go, a house that’s not really a home, you roam.

Defense Tactics

I do not pray for my enemies.

I besiege their walls & wait for their downfall.

I will not love those, who do not love me.

I remember and will not forgive the lies until you’ve returned my wasted time.

Even still,

I bear no ill will,

But I won’t forgive,

I’ll just pretend.. the way you did.

The Visit

Phone started ringing at like 12AM, we met at the Shell earlier, she just got in… And was wondering, if I was still with my friends and if I wasn’t if I wanted to come see her a minute…

Well.. I guess it depends, on what she’s got in mind and if she’s got any kids (yeah)… Nah, nevermind, I’ll probably just chill at the crib. A couple of minutes later, it started ringing again…

The number looked familiar but ain’t saved in my phone. I’m drunk, so I said fuck it, I’m gonna answer, hello?…

The voice said, I know that you can’t stand me, but you remember me? It’s Brandi?

I said the one I used to wax like a candle? The one that it was never nothing that she couldn’t handle? The one that said I used to fuck her better than her man do?

She replied like, yeah so? But what you doing now though? Henny talking on both shoulders, dog this chick like Alpo…

Told her nothing, bout to roll up. Ima come over there hold up, now this Operation’s covert… “no man” is the code word.

Learned from my mistakes, so it’s no way I’m gon slip, I only pistol whip with Magnums on some Goldeneye shit. Only visiting for now, but always packing for a trip. With him she been wishing it was me inside them hips.

Neighbors probably hear the knocking. And it’ll stay like this as long as she keep calling. Fuck it if he don’t like it, true story, I ain’t even have to write this.

Ramblings of Unfinished…ness

La Sagrada familia is one of the most famous pieces of architecture in the world. It has fascinated me, in that it’s architect, Antoni Gaudi, died before his work could be finished. To this day, it remains unfinished in fact. The thought of beginning a project, something you know people will love, and not being able to see the completion bothered me. At first. Until I realized that I am unfinished as well, and may never be able to see what I intend for my completion to look like. 

But, if I can begin to craft what I intend for the finished product to look like. An outline, to provide an idea of what I had in mind and what I wanted my life’s work to look like… I acknowledge, things may not end up exactly like the blueprint. Do people find it more or less frustrating, to know beforehand, that the schedule of completion is tentative? Or would you prefer to believe things are on schedule, when just the opposite is true? 

Just a Friend pt.2

I just can’t seem to seize this moment. I’ve been so close and I admit I believe that there may be hope yet. The right day, the right atmosphere and I can have you. If only for one night. Just focus. Listen friend, we should really do some exploring. Can you just take a moment to hear me out?… 

I get, happy feelings from your name in my notification window. Never a dull moment, steady sips of innuendo. I want to be myself, sometimes, but I must remember. While I want to be your lover, you just want to be a friend though. 

We text like half the day, about work and the justice system. I spend the time between response thinking of what I’m missing. You’ve got the perfect shape, and I’m so in love with your figure. I could be your perfect lover but I’m just another nigga.

When you hit me up on Snapchat, I always hope it’s a picture. But it never is and it snaps me outta my feelings. We been friends since high school and I’ve watched as you’ve gotten thicker. But since you know my exes, you won’t let me see your nipples.

If I had a flashy thing, like Men in Black after contact. I’d erase the memories that have caused you to overreact. Decisions of my past, reincarnated just to haunt me. I seriously want you, I just wish that you would want me.